Why is it that for many people it’s so much easier to offer help when someone needs it, but much more difficult to ask for help when you need it? Many people are hardwired to want to be independent and self-reliant, and when we need help – whether logistically or emotionally – this is then mistaken as a sign of weakness, when it really isn’t. Like a muscle, this is something that many of us have to grow and strengthen (albeit uncomfortable at times). With practice, it can be easier and more natural to ask for help and so we’ve gathered some tips to help you grow that muscle:
1) Start small – Start with easy things such as asking a friend for advice or an employee at a store to help locate an item.
2) Help others – Reciprocity is key to maintaining any social relationship, so if you put an effort into helping others, that help will typically be reciprocated.
3) Don’t make assumptions – Don’t assume that people aren’t willing to help you. Most people are very willing to provide any help they can, and typically if they’re unable to provide you with resources or the help you need, they often times know someone who can.
4) Be specific – the easiest way to ask for help is to ask for directly what you need and articulate that request clearly.
And just a reminder asking for help doesn’t mean you’re incapable or weak. It means you know (or are learning your) limitations and are courageous enough to show your vulnerability. Some of us at Nichols Law feel the most alive when we are helping others so don’t be afraid to ask for help when you need it.
